


Juniper

by lollipopmania



Series: Juniper [1]
Category: Fallen - Lauren Kate
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, F/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-07-31
Updated: 2013-09-26
Packaged: 2017-11-11 02:35:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/473535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lollipopmania/pseuds/lollipopmania
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She had promised to always stay by his side, but promises don't always last, do they? A drabble series written off a 30 day prompt. RoArr.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Juniper
> 
> a/n: this is from a 30 Day Drabble prompt on tumblr. I'll update here and on ff.net as often as possible! the words are taken in order. Slight AU.

_beginning_

 

The sky had turned an ashen grey and in the distance, a roll of thunder crashed over the mountain tops. He didn't hear everything that was said. No man could. And He was just a man. Their father, yes. Their creator, yes. But only a man nonetheless. And when they spoke, secret whispers in corridors and looks passed among their thrones, He didn't know. But someone was always listening, always watching

And so he had followed her down here. Down upon the naked earth, no other being in sight. Only trees and dirt and sky. In their true forms, they stood as tall as the mountains, each step a tremble against the ground.

Arriane stood with her arms by her sides; yards of space kept them apart. They had never been particularly close. He was her brother, and though that went a very long way, she had thousands ofthem, and he was just one more. But he was Daniel's friend, had fought beside him on more than one occasion, and Arriane trusted Daniel. And so, she trusted Roland.

But she had not brought him down here. She had not asked him for this. She had simply come down for a moment. He was the one who had followed.

"You still have faith, don't you?" She asked slowly, wind whipping dark tendrils of hair back around her neck.

"Faith in who? Our father?"

"Who else?"

Roland's eyes widened in surprise. "How could I not? Do you not?"

Arriane turned her gaze to angle at the ground below. "I never said such a thing."

"No," he countered, growing heated. "But you certainly implied it."

"I did nothing of the sort!" Her nostrils flared in the silence before Arriane cast her eyes back to the sky as another roll of thunder echoed. She took a long breath and quieted herself. "You've heard the whispers, Roland."

"They are only whispers."

"There are spies among us. Spies! We are children of the Creator, _His_ warrior's. And He does not trust us."

Roland's fists clenched and his throat bobbed. There was pounding in his ears much louder than any thunder threatening the sky. She wasn't right. She couldn't be. Yes, he'd heard the whispers. He'd heard them among the ones he trusted. He'd heard them among the others. But that meant nothing.

"How do you have blind faith in a man you have never even met?" Arriane continued slowly. "A man who gives us orders we must follow without question, who treats us as sions rather than sons; who we must serve without sight and trust without truth? He denies us all the pleasure He gives mankind. Why do we suffer when our only crime is doing His will?"

Roland took a step forward, bruising the ground and quaking the earth with his mass. "Stop it, Arriane." He demanded, loud and echoing. "You are beginning to sound like _him_."

"Lucifer did not doubt," Arriane whispered thickly, leaning back as Roland grabbed her wrist with heated force. "He only disobeyed."

"And you?" Arriane looked at the ground again, breath coming in heavy, low pants. After a beat, her eyes shot up to lock onto his. "I doubt."

Roland's hand clenched tighter. "Don't." He said mechanically. "Always have faith."

She stared at him a moment longer, asking him everything and telling him nothing. And then a moment later, with a burst of pure white light, she was gone and Roland stood alone in an empty land. A dozen rain drops fell upon his shoulders and his wings instinctively moved to cover his torso. After a moment of thought, he removed his wings and expanded them sideways to open his body to the coming monsoon.

He had told her to have faith, but she had given him doubt. And like he was warned, once seeded, it began to grow. Not even the rain could wash him clean.


	2. Accusation

_Juniper_

 

a/n:  i think this pairing/book in general needs a bigger fandom. i'd imagine this one takes place a good while after the previous chapter. roland-centric.

…………

_accusation_

His heart burned. Sweat oozed from his pores, glistening over his brown skin; curving along the lines of woven muscle, creeping into the crevices the lines of his body created. Temptation was raw. And he had doubted. Doubted--for _years_ now. 

But it was only now that he sinned. 

The woman he had chosen was not special. She most beautiful in her village, yes, but not anything so tempting to urge him to bend. She wasn't. She was exciting, with tanned skin and long dark hair and eyes as bright as the sun. When she laughed, the sound echoed around the caves her people inhabited, bringing joy and light to anyone around her. They all admired her. The strongest men attempted to woo her. The women heeded her word. She was a queen.  

And she had been a virgin.  

He had ruined her as much as she had ruined him.

He'd been watching her every now and then since her birth. He had wondered how different her life would be from his. How humane and beautiful while his was only subservient. Roland was not an independent thinker. He was neither arrogant nor proud. But he doubted the will--the existence, even--of his father.  

And that consistent, anxious, clawing of doubt had led him to sin. 

He had fallen to temptation. It was not her that had tempted him, she had merely been his pick. It was the thought of sex. The temptation and urge and need and desperate arousal that left him wanting and weary. He had already broken word by  doubting. He had continued to break it when his hands had wandered beneath the tiers of robes that covered his form. It wasn't necessarily worse to take a woman than it was to taint oneself by ones own hands, but now he couldn't condone his actions to misleading thoughts. He couldn't act as though his sins were only in his mind. Now there was proof. There was proof that he had gone against his own law.

He wondered, briefly, if anyone knew he was here. If any of his brothers had watched him ravage the young woman upon her bed. Would he not be allowed back into heaven? Had he already fallen, now? Would Arriane realize that this was her fault? Would they all realize that he didn't regret?

Roland sat on a stone on the edge of the bedroom, his elbows resting on his knees. His clothing on the floor beneath his feet. 

He didn't regret it. He didn't want to atone; to seek forgiveness and be allowed to live in the Kingdom of Heaven once again. 

He knew, then, that he would rather stay and divulge into all the decadence and euphoria that defined _sin_.

With one last look at his partner resting quietly behind him, Roland stepped through the stones and into the crescenting dawn. With little thought, he found himself able to disappear back into his homeland. He hadn't been expelled yet. No one knew of his betrayal, yet. But it was no matter. Roland knew any accusation was futile. He didn't know how much longer he could pretend to be… _good_. 

He wasn't. He didn't know when--it  might have been the previous night or possibly years before that--but somewhere along the line, Roland had lost his faith. 

It wasn't just doubt and sin anymore. It was cold and hard and irrevocably resilient. He didn't question the existence of his Father. He just didn't believe in His intentions.  

 

…………

 

notes: wow the rest of them will probably not be as dark as the last two, actually probably more fluffy. 

 

reviews are always very appreciated! thank you!

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I kind of like the idea of Arriane being the one to doubt God before Roland did, kind of planting the idea in his head, although he was the one who chose to fall first.
> 
> quick notes on the story:
> 
> I plan on making this in order and somewhat AU. I'm not going to involve Tess or Rosalie or any of that. And my use of Christian Mythology in this story will probably be different from the use of it in the books. This scene was inspired by that awesome Anna/Castiel scene in supernatural. Baby.
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading! Please review and I'll post the next one soon!


End file.
